Monday, July 4, 2011

Happy Independence Day!

Wow I look back and see how much I do not use my blog.  I need to start writing here more.  I have learned in the last few months that as we grow in our Faith, our lives begin to change and sometimes things that we thought were right now become not so right.  I have learned that my strength comes from my Heavenly Father and not from anyone else and knowing that he is always there for me, means I don't have to rely on others to be there.  This past weekend our Pastor spoke about who holds the key to your happiness.  We learned this at LTS as well and I came home knowing something different, I am not responsible for the actions of my husband, daughter, mother, aunt or friends and even some of them I am not responsible to them but I am only responsible to my family but not for them!  That took so much weight off my shoulders and yesterday when Pastor spoke about that again, it hit home once more.  I have always been the caregiver of my family, I figured it was my gift from God to care for others, never questioned it, actually still don't but I am looking at it with different eyes now.  I am responsible to my husband as his wife and partner but I am not responsible to make sure he takes his meds or eats lunch, I am responsible to my daughter but I am not responsible to make sure she cleans her room or has clean clothes for work.  Realizing now all of the people that I felt responsible for in my life that I no longer have to is such a joyful feeling.

I love the fact that I am growing more "mature" in my walk with the Lord and am truly blessed because he placed me in a loving, caring church at the right time in my life.  Nate spoke over us yesterday and he reminded me that I need to write my list of people who I "belive" I am responsible for and start crossing them off.  So that's what I have done!  I hold the key to my own happiness and I am moving forward to that.

Wow, now that felt good to write this all down, even if no one reads it, I have it in my journal for another day when I go back and feel responsible for someone!  Hope you all have a Bless 4th of July!

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